Urban Exploration

At first glance, this alley is ugly and boring. But in the long run, I believe this shameless visibility of waste helps keep capitalism honest.

I first became aware of Fraser Street's chaotic beauty from the front. After picking up a month's supply of Polish mustard near 26th, I wandered into The Cornerstone, otherwise known as the weirdest thrift shop on the East side. It smelled like cigarettes and cough syrup and mould. Statues of Jesus and Mary leaned precariously against the entire 'Star Trek' novel series. I bought a book called "Apocalypse Next," which the woman behind the counter had read.

"This is quite a find," she said, staring into my eyes. "You always think about the apocalypse, and what would happen. But do you ever stop and think about what would happen next?"

We both paused for a few seconds after this.

"No, I guess I don't," I replied.

I left, feeling like I had narrowly avoided something.

Five minutes later, I found out. Around the back of The Cornerstone was one of the more interesting piles of crap I have come across in my urban travels. The breadth was stunning; furniture, electronics, clothing, mechanical parts, and bits of food were artfully combined. The dominant mystery of the pile lay in a pair of shoes at its base. How did they get there?

A Possible Explanation For The Shoes, Screen, and Chair

The shoes in particular, point to some kind of complex human-junk interaction. They were hastily removed in some sort of excitement. I believe the barefooted human climbed on top of the chairs piled directly in front, perhaps in order to access a then-intact computer monitor located high on the pile of junk. Once the monitor was picked up, the human was startled, dropped the monitor, broke it, and ran off with no time for shoes.

Who Smashed The Aquarium, and Why

It is my belief that it was smashed inside of Fraser Aquarium, deemed worthless, and left two stores down in order to avoid association with the above-mentioned store. However, this association is difficult to avoid, considering the lack of other aquarium stores on the block. Also possible is some sort of over-aggressive fish, left outside to calm down, which then broke free from its watery jail and is now running rampant around East Vancouver.

The Aquarium, Two Weeks Later, Still Smashed

No one wants this aquarium, or knows where to put it. The leaves are still in the exact position they held two weeks previous, only slightly deflated. No glass has fallen. How long will this remain? Months? Years? Only time will tell.

For more excitement, I suggest exploring your own alley, and checking up regularly. It is much better than a crossword puzzle, and makes you feel less stupid.